"Well, if you're not gay, why haven't you got that nice girl pregnant yet?" It's the sort of question one expects only from atrocious, senile grandparents and the British press in silly season.
Beset by trollish gossip about his relationship with his former aide Christopher Myers, the Foreign Secretary has felt obliged to make an extremely intimate public announcement about the state of his wife's uterus to satisfy the snarling attack-dogs of the sweltering summer media hiatus. Poor William Hague. Poor Chris Myers. And poor Ffion Hague, whose multiple miscarriages have now been offered to the world as evidence of her husband's integrity and virility.
If there is one lesson we've learned in the past week, amid the breathless coverage of David and Samantha Cameron's new arrival, it's that the reproductive organs of Tory wives are extremely important and deeply indicative of their husbands' capacity to exercise power responsibly and well. After all, if a man doesn't know and control what's going on in his lady's pants, how can he be expected to run a government department?
The link between Mrs Hague's repeated, tragic loss of pregnancy and Mr Hague's heterosexuality is not necessarily straightforward, but it's the closest one can come in a public forum to "I've definitely been sleeping with my wife".
Hague seems to have accepted the rather Orwellian narrative that regular, productive heterosexual intercourse within the confines of marriage is a man's duty to the Tory party, and the press has goaded him into an explicit statement that he's been doing his duty. Will that be enough uncomfortable personal revelation to satisfy the ravenous media machine?
Unfortunately, it's probably exactly what we wanted. The British press seems to nurse an interminable fascination with what Conservatives do in bed together, and the party is clearly anxious to avoid another series of sex scandals like those that beset the Back to Basics years. Only by diverting the media's attention with a highly personal story which nevertheless emphasises that the New Tories are moral, married, faithful and fertile -- not the kinky Conservatives of John Major's premiership -- could Hague and his handlers have hoped to defuse this scandal.
Would it matter if William Hague was a closeted homosexual or bisexual? Yes, it would, simply because it would raise serious questions about the hypocrisy of his previous defence of Section 28. In the light of his extremely revealing statement, however, and in the light of the rumours having originated from that paragon of mature, well-researched online commentary, Guido "Terribly Dangerous" Fawkes, I'd venture to suggest that Hague's claim never to have had a relationship with another man is probably grounded. Yet all this juicy chatter misses the point entirely.
Even if Hague is straighter than a die, it doesn't make his ugly defence of homophobic policies and policymakers one jot more justified. Furthermore, whatever the Foreign Secretary's sexual proclivities, Ffion Hague's miscarriages have no bearing on his ability to do his job responsibly -- the Hagues could be as fertile and faithful as a pair of Catholic rabbits and William Hague would still be a grim prospect in the Foreign Office. And -- most importantly -- no woman's uterus is public property. Not even if they've had the poor taste to marry a Tory minister.
It never ceases to amaze me how conservative the western media is, even when they claim - snobbishly - to have the upper hand over those from 'less developed countries', i.e., Third World nations. The witchhunt to which William and Ffion have been subjected would not have been out of place in the Cuba of the 60s and 70s when homosexuality was the only crime why many young men ended up in the infamous UMAPs.
ReplyDeleteYou're right, Penny, what really matters chez William, is his policies and these ones are definitely worth scrutinising.
Good post as usual. Glad to see the hippies at the Edinburgh Climate Camp did not kidnap you. :-)
There's something bizarre in responding to an apparently homophobic attack on you by issuing a statement that's itself at least implicitly homophobic ("Any suggestion that his appointment was due to an improper relationship between us is utterly false, as is any suggestion that I have ever been involved in a relationship with any man.) but I don't see how you can reduce his statement to "I've definetly been sleeping with my wife" - the miscarriages are referred to in the context of explaining why the broader and longer term (pre-Guido) speculation about their marriage has been particularly hurtful to them.
ReplyDeleteTend to agree that the degree of intimate information released is painful, but there is a clear logic to it.
You also seem to be implying that Ffion Hague had less free choice about the disclosure than did her husband - which I've certainly seen no evidence to support - and that's itself a fairly unpleasant speculation about their marriage...
There's something bizarre in responding to an apparently homophobic attack on you by issuing a statement that's itself at least implicitly homophobic ("Any suggestion that his appointment was due to an improper relationship between us is utterly false, as is any suggestion that I have ever been involved in a relationship with any man.) but I don't see how you can reduce his statement to "I've definetly been sleeping with my wife" - the miscarriages are referred to in the context of explaining why the broader and longer term (pre-Guido) speculation about their marriage has been particularly hurtful to them.
ReplyDeleteTend to agree that the degree of intimate information released is painful, but there is a clear logic to it.
You also seem to be implying that Ffion Hague had less free choice about the disclosure than did her husband - which I've certainly seen no evidence to support - and that's itself a fairly unpleasant speculation about their marriage...
There's something bizarre in responding to an apparently homophobic attack on you by issuing a statement that's itself at least implicitly homophobic ("Any suggestion that his appointment was due to an improper relationship between us is utterly false, as is any suggestion that I have ever been involved in a relationship with any man.) but I don't see how you can reduce his statement to "I've definetly been sleeping with my wife" - the miscarriages are referred to in the context of explaining why the broader and longer term (pre-Guido) speculation about their marriage has been particularly hurtful to them.
ReplyDeleteTend to agree that the degree of intimate information released is painful, but there is a clear logic to it.
You also seem to be implying that Ffion Hague had less free choice about the disclosure than did her husband - which I've certainly seen no evidence to support - and that's itself a fairly unpleasant speculation about their marriage...
Poor Ffion, perhaps her decision to allow her husband to talk publicly about her miscarriages will help other women. If someone of them have been reluctant to talk about it with anyone, and then they think, "Well, that poor Ffion has let millions of people know that she's been through it" and decide that talking about it to a few selected people might help them ...???
ReplyDeleteOf course, I'm assuming that she knew her husband was going to mention the miscarriages. He couldn't be that dense, could he?
But, basically, yes, good points. Talking to people and getting hugs might work better than tea. Tea is good, but solidarity might be better for bereavement.
Very sorry to hear about the dog.
Of course, the real story might be his sperm count...not that it would be proof of an (in)ability to do a job either.
ReplyDelete[redpesto]
Talking of virile members (of parliament), have you seen the sextracts from the Blair me-me-me memoir?
Actually, no. Not to cast aspersions, but technically, unless we've seen a paternity test, Samantha Cameron's children, and by the same token Ffion's miscarriages, indicate nothing about their husbands of any certainty whatsoever. As I'm sure you realise.
ReplyDeleteBut... was anyone suggesting that William Hague was gay because he doesn't have children?
ReplyDeleteMaybe the reaction and revelation say more about Mr. Hague than those who were insinuating bum action.
BTW I was reading some of my old comments on your blog and they were fucking great. You should be more thankful.
Well said.
ReplyDeleteWhat thia does highlight is the responsibility on blogs to exercise responsibility in their pieces, rather than peddle mindless innuendos and gossip. Of course, William Hague should have known how this would have been perceived by the salacious media machine.
I find the idea that William Hague is sexually active in any way, gay or straight, rather repulsive. Once an image like that gets conjured in your mind it's impossible to get rid of it.
ReplyDeleteIf heterosexual potency is the measure of a man, at least as far as British political life goes, what about David Miliband? He has no progeny and adopted two American boys to fill in the gap in his family unit. Why not adopt a British child or children I ask myself but there you go. Does anybody care whether Miliband might be gay, sterile or impotent? Or whether his wife has reproductive difficulties? Or whatever?
ReplyDeleteDoes any of this really matter?
Not much as far as I can see.
Hi, I'm a new poster here. This reminds me of something Noam Chomsky has talked extensively about: the media diversion of "the muddled herd" by focussing on non-issues rather than genuinely important things that are happening at the same time (things that would be most inconvenient for those in the citadels of power if there was a proper public discourse on them)... One such example is the pressing questions we on the left should be raising about Coulson's role as Tory media adviser.
ReplyDeleteHowever, you are spot on about the hypocrisy of Hague if there turns out to be some substance to all the childish gossip and hand-wringing.
very blog
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